A Brief Pause

Late last week I had a voicemail from the community health center where I had interviewed (before I got a chance to withdraw my application). They were in the checking references stage and wanted me to know that they were prepared to offer me a position.

Part of me was relieved that I had already accepted the oncology position and therefore didn’t have to wrestle with the decision anymore.

The other part started second-guessing my choice. Community health is where I’m comfortable. It’s where I’ve grown professionally over the past two years. It’s interesting and stimulating (when it’s not completely frustrating).

Which is prescisely why I think I made the right decision. I’ve written before about my need to stretch myself, to develop new skills, to work with the uncomfortable moments of my career without running for the hills. (I used to be good at coping with displacement – I lived in Ghana for a year, for crying out loud!)

But if I am going to continue my education, to teach others, to be a leader, I need to start from the beginning. I need to be willing to be taught and led first. If I stay in community health where I am comfortable and skilled, I may never stretch myself the way I need to be stretched.

But it sure did feel good to be wanted. 🙂

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