Getting There

Two weeks down on my floor orientation (halfway done, if you can believe that!). Still have a lot to learn and a lot of skills to refresh, but I feel SO good about this move.

In a way, my optimism is a bit surprising. I was so down on acute care nursing when I left the PCU two years ago. I was also down on myself. There were many moments of wondering how I fit into this profession …. or if I fit into it at all.

I’m realizing that it wasn’t acute care nursing that was the problem (although I’m still terrified and still have a loooooooooong way to go before I feel like I even remotely know what I’m doing). It was the culture of nursing I was exposed to as a new nurse. Despite positive relationships with individual nurses in my life, my first experience as a practicing RN featured burnt out preceptors (or just plain bullies), a lack of autonomy and respect for nursing at my workplace and a less than supportive manager.

Juxtapose that with a Magnet-designated hospital, where my team truly feels like a team and I know that even if I were to have a really shitty night, I’d have a community around me to have my back. Contrast the preceptor who made me cry with the charge nurses and mentors who go out of their way to help me learn the ropes. Imagine a group of nurses who love their jobs sincerely and genuinely, even on the shifts when they are running ragged.

I have no delusions of grandeur or illusions that this job will be a cake walk. But I won’t be walking it alone.

And that makes all the difference.

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