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Feb
27

Guardian Angel

As you can no doubt tell, the last few months have been a little rough. Nothing like a crappy economy and a saturated local job market to do a number on a new grad RN’s self-confidence. Add that to the lack of understanding among loving but unaware friends and family who just don’t get it, who can’t believe that smart/successful Nurse Teeny can’t find a job and ask well-meaning but ouch-worthy questions like, “Isn’t there a nursing shortage?” or “Have you thought of trying X, Y, or Z?” Yes, in fact, I have.

And then there’s my nursing school, that seems to have become deaf and unwilling to listen to our extremely valid concerns about the way they are (not) responding to this economic crisis. The cohort behind us is pretty much being lied to.

Needless to say, fuses have been a little short. Many a tear has been shed.

But in my Zumba class last week, the cool-down song was Israel Kamakawiwoʻole’s version of “Over the Rainbow” … Who knows why my instructor picked it, but it was exactly what I needed!

This was a really special song for my Dad and me, and has been since I was five years old and obsessed with The Wizard of Oz. The rendition by Iz is especially significant because Hawai’i is a special place for our family.When the Zumba teacher started playing “our song”, I pretty much lost it right there.

I’ve never really been a person who believes in “signs”. But since my father’s death, there have been moments like this. Little messages from my own guardian angel reminding me I’m going to be okay.

When he was alive and I felt overwhelmed, all I had to do was make a phone call and he had a way of talking me down. Now it’s not that simple. But he still manages to find a way. 🙂

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